What is a river, exactly? In all seriousness, what differentiates a river from a creek, a brook, a run or some of the other watercourses mapped on Toponymia? Clearly it comes down to size and volume. But where does one draw the line between what should be called a “river” and what should not?
So the definition seems to lack a certain precision and creates a bit of a dilemma. Well, not for me exactly, but certainly for residents of places claiming to host the “World’s Shortest River.”
Never underestimate the lengths to which local cheerleaders and boosters will aspire to, simply to attract some positive attention to their little corner of the world. This specific honor may not hold much value to the general public. However, it does create pride for those that may not have much else that would be considered the World’s Something-est.
I’ve seen some short rivers during my journeys. I once traveled down the entire diminutive length of the Pine River in Charlevoix, Michigan (map):
The Pine River connects Lake Charlevoix to Lake Michigan. If one considers Round Lake to be a separate body of water from the Pine River — which appears to be the case according to the U.S. Board on Geographic Names — then this “river” stretches no more than about 1,500 feet (457 metres). I sailed along this puny river while taking the ferry to Beaver Island. The ferry departs from Round Lake near its drainage into the Pine River.
Michigan’s Pine River is a veritable giant however, practically Amazonian in length compared to actual claimants to the title.
The D River
A tiny sliver of water connects Devils Lake to the Pacific Ocean in Lincoln City, Oregon. It remained unnamed so the local Chamber of Commerce held a contest in 1940. They selected the D River which makes one think that the other options must have been truly awful. Apparently It wasn’t good enough to have just a tiny river. They had to give it a tiny name, too (map).
Road signs proclaim unabashedly that the D River is the world’s shortest. It’s certainly a mighty midget among riverine contenders along its entire 440 foot (134 metre) dash toward the sea. I’ve actually driven down the stretch of U.S. Route 101 across the D River but I didn’t realize its significance at the time. I must have blinked.
The Roe River
Schoolchildren in Great Falls, Montana noticed fame and glory accruing to the D River. So they decided that their own beloved Roe River had been short-changed. They mounted a challenge.
The Roe River runs 201 feet (61 metres) between the Giant Springs and the Missouri River (map). It runs through Giant Springs State Park which is “one of the largest freshwater springs in the world, flowing at 156 million gallons of water per day.”
The Guinness Book of World Records listed the D River as the shortest river for many years. The new claimant in Montana created a great deal of controversy and knocked the D straight off the world stage. People in Lincoln City did not take to this kindly. The length of the D River shrank miraculously to 120 feet (37 meters) based on new measurements from the line of “extreme high tide.” Wink. Wink.
The Guinness Book of World Records must have finally soured on the competition. Dueling contenders continued to throw insults and grasp at new lengths of ridiculousness. Guinness eventually dropped the World’s Shortest River category.
The Reprua River
That’s too bad because there is now a new leading contender. Reputedly, the Reprua (Reproa) River in Abkhazia, extends only 59 feet (18 meters). Abkhazia is either an independent republic (if one lives in Abkhazia, Russia, Nicaragua, Venezuela or Nauru) or an autonomous republic of Georgia (if one lives just about anywhere else).
Notice that earlier claims focused on the United States. I think this may have had more to do with very few people caring enough about this question to actually apply a tape measure to waterways.
I’m not sure exactly where it’s located. I don’t read Cyrillic or Georgian so the websites don’t do me much good. Also the satellite images aren’t the best. However, it’s probably somewhere along this stretch of coastline. Supposedly it begins from one of the large springs in Voronya Cave (also called Krubera Cave). Then it bursts briefly into the open before emptying into the Black Sea.
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